Perfectly Flawed

        Perfection is what we hope in our minds would be our reality, but it certainly isn’t because we are flawed in every aspect of our lives but perfectly flawed.

      There are always somethings in our life that we would love to be perfect especially when Society dictates what a beautiful woman or a handsome man should look like and for many years I have never been beauty conscious until society change my perception of what and who they think I should be. Naïve and insecure my life started to be dictated by what people thought of me.

     I started looking at myself as ugly and damaged even when paid with the smallest compliment I ask myself Are those persons are seeing perfectly? This for many years place a longing in my heart. A feeling of trying to belong, finding ways to hide my imperfection, those things that I thought made me who I was started to make me feel less of a woman and for years even when I put the best out there I was unhappy. I was living my life at a standard that the world justifies as what perfection should be and so I started to change who I was because I wanted to escape my own body.

     A lot of things hampered that love for myself including accidents that made me different but no less beautiful, simple things that could be replaced but I could not look myself in the mirror because that was not what Society said beautiful was.

This perception hampered my confidence in life because nothing I did was ever good enough and I tried to be that which I thought I needed to be for acceptance even when I knew I did not feel like I belong there.

During my Adult years I started dating I realize my relationships could never last because no one understood who I was and what I was trying to be not even me. I kept losing because I wanted persons to accept me being perfect, but they were not into perfection they were looking for love, they were looking for simplicity, they were looking for someone to be perfectly flawed with.

Its not like I was not easy going or kind or sincere to all these persons in my life. I just didn’t know how to be me even when they saw my flaws they accepted it, they accepted me but after a long battle with my inner self I finally chose to be proud of my flaws and  I was surprise that the person I was hiding was so accepted by the people who knew and love me for me but most importantly I accepted me just for me.

I am perfectly Flawed, beautiful in my own skin, with my own hair and creating a path way for others to find themselves. I am not advocating for change I am just simply saying open your eyes to the realization that no matter who you want to be and choose to be, no one can truly be you but you and your perfect been you.  Perfection is not about having everything aligned perfectly its about realizing and understanding your flaws perfectly and loving them just the same.